All World
Gayatri Pariwar

  Among all the streams of yoga, Grahastha Yoga (yoga of married life) is also one. If one gives a serious thought to it, one would realize that raising a family is indeed a very important, and yet relatively simple yoga. Accomplishing this yoga renders enormous joy and illumines the path of worldly fulfillment and spiritual progress. Here we cite some tips for adept practice of this unique yoga[1]. 

Mantra 1: Fundamental Tenets of Grahastha Yoga

A child learns several primary activities at home. More than half of the skills that are needed in life are also learnt at home. Our sadhana of innerrrefinement must also begin at home. The best laboratory to train life to attain greatness, selfrcontrol and selflessness, and to become cultured and serviceroriented is home itself. It becomes very convenient to do all this at home because in familyrlife there is natural love, sense of duty, mutual dependence and cooperation. Home is a stable place and is secure from the prying eyes of strangers.

A disciple of Grahastha Yoga must always contemplate in the following way:
My family is my hermitage – the most holy place for my sadhana.

The rituals prescribed to me are – devote my energies and best efforts always to develop my home like a beautiful, fragrant, fertile garden.

My devotion to God is to fulfill the responsibility entrusted to me by God for watering, and maintaining this garden and help it flourish.
I do not consider any member of my family small and unworthy of deserving of my service, and I do not take undue pride in being the owner, master, leader or the breadwinner of my family.

My benevolence and selflessness is in devoting my service to the upbringing and personality development of each member of my family.

My selfrsurrender is to serve others with absolutely pure feeling of dutifulness, without expecting anything in return.

My penance is to provide happiness and comforts to my family members even at the expense of my personal happiness and comfort.
My yagya is to enhance peace and happiness in this world by making each and every member of my family a refined, truthful, honest and responsible individual.

My religious vow is to make my conduct and behaviour so pure and idealistic that it would silently inspire everyone to follow me and become virtuous.

My selfrrestraint is to raise my family within the rightfully earned means of income.

My aradhana (service to society) is to be always filled with love, benevolence and compassion, and to enhance happiness, joy and unity in the family and my neighborhood.

My worship is to have complete devotion towards living idols of God in the temple of my home and to adorn them with ornaments of virtues, noble nature and good conduct.

My sadhana is true, my feelings towards my sadhana are genuine and sincere, and my soul knows that I am truthful.

Like a true unattached karmayogi I draw my happiness and satisfaction from the sincere efforts I put into my sadhana without worrying about their success or failure.    I have taken an oath to be truthful and righteous, and I would forever try to uphold it with all sincerity.

Every Grahastha Yogi should adopt these mantras wholerheartedly. He must chant them several times during the day. He may write these on a small card and carry it along and he should read them whenever he gets time, contemplating upon each written word. If possible, he should frame it in a poster and hang it upon a wall in his room. Early in the morning while getting up from sleep he must read these mantras a few times before getting busy in the daily chores, and take a vow that he would try his best throughout the day to do all the activities in accordance with the deep sentiments hidden in these words and that he would sincerely try to match his conduct with these thoughts. For one who leaves his bed contemplating upon these mantras, this effect would stay with him throughout the day. The instructions given to the inner unconscious mind early in the morning go very deep; they do not fade in the memory easily and recur in the conscious mind at the right time.

Mantra 2: The Oath of Firmness

Every morning a Grahastha Yogi must chant –
I am a Grahastha Yogi

My life is oriented towards sadhana

What do others do, how they do it, what they do, say and think – I do not care, for I am satisfied with myself

My true sadhana of performing my duties is so great, so satisfying, calming and fulfilling that it suffuses my soul with bliss
I shall continue my enriching, blissful sadhana uninterruptedly

I shall always perform all my duties towards my home with selfless attitude.


This oath must get firmly ingrained in mind. Whenever the mind begins to waver and infirmities appear to set in, this oath must be reaffirmed with sincerity.

Before falling asleep in the night all the actions during the day should be thought over again:

What activities did I do today that were related to my family?

What were my errors in carrying these out?

What inappropriate actions did I perform out of selfishness?

What wrongs did I do unintentionally?

Which actions were good, appropriate and in perfect accordance with the tenets of 

Grahastha Yoga?

All the activities done for the family must be divided into these categories and then means to correct the errors made must be found out. Adopting the process of (i) searching for mistakes and errors, (ii) accepting them, (iii) being ashamed of them, and (iv) putting sincere, honest efforts to correct them , one can reduce one’s mistakes dayrbyrday.

Mantra 3: The Oath to Fight All Shortcomings and Faults

On the path of sadhana of Grahastha Yoga, a sadhak is faced with a number of new problems every day. Sometimes due to his errors and at other times due to others’, incidents keep unfolding that are not in consonance with the tenets of G—ahastha Yoga. A sadhak wishes that each of his action should be perfect and according to the principles, but mistakes keep recurring. Sadhak believes that in a few days, in a few weeks, or a few months all his faults would be rectified and his actions would become perfect. But when a long time passes by and the errors do not subside, then his mind begins to worry and feelings of disappointment and failure begin to creep in. He thinks: “I am trying so hard and yet am unable to sublimate my nature. I err daily and my sadhana is not progressing properly.” Sometimes he thinks: “My family members are silly, idiotic and irresponsible. They trouble me and annoy me; they do not allow me to tread on the path of sadhana. So it is not worth continuing my sadhana anymore.” Egged on by such disappointing thoughts he gives up on his oath.

Every sadhak must take precautions against this difficulty. It is certainly true that human nature has its own fallacies and shortcomings. The day a human overcomes all his shortcomings he would attain the supreme spiritual state, and become free. Till he has not arrived at his destination, he has to remain in human form with all its known shortcomings. When there is a mix of several individuals, in which some are in an advanced spiritual state and some are lagging behind, it is but natural that new errors and mistakes would surface everyday. Some of these would be committed by us, some by others. The frequency of occurrence of these errors would reduce gradually, but it is impossible to believe that our family would transform into a family of deities. So neither there is any need to be afraid of difficulties nor to get worried and perturbed. After all, sadhana stands for ‘the practice to correct errors’ and this practice must go on unhindered.

Yogis practice their sadhanas like Pranayam, selfrcontrol and meditation every day because their mental makeup still has some shortcomings. The moment these are removed, they also would attain selfrrealization. Being devoid of all faults is a sign of reaching the pinnacle, the final destination. Sadhaks should not even expect that all the desired virtues would come into action with a short practice of sadhana. Thoughts can come to mind in a flash but for them to get fully ingrained as an intrinsic tendency is a long, laborious process. To make an impression upon a stone the rope has to rub against it for a long, long time. One must understand that absolute freedom from all faults is the final aim; it is the final state of evolution of a being. It is not a sign of the first stage of sadhana. If one begins to search for mangoes amongst leaves of a newly grown plant, he has to return disappointed.

Rather than expecting total perfection, one must observe whether there is at least some increase in sattwik (pure, serene) qualities or not. If there is even a little bit of progress it is a sign of hope, joy and success. A drop on drop fills the whole pot; a grain on grain becomes a quintal. If there is a little bit of success daily, then in the long run, great success will be achieved. And this wealth does not get destroyed ever. This accumulation continues life after life and we would certainly reach our final destination definitely at the end. If progress is being made littlerbyrlittle, one must keep going with renewed enthusiasm. There is no need to feel disappointed and disheartened.

When one comes face to face with personal shortcomings during selfrintrospection, one must not feel dejected. One must strengthen these feelings –

Like a brave soldier I am fighting this battle that would continue throughout lifetime.

All the bad samskaras my family members and I have acquired over countless previous births keep presenting obstacles in my path. Sometimes I err, sometimes they. Obstacles keep coming, but I would not let them discourage me.

I would fight all the difficulties I am faced with. When I trip and fall, I would not give up. I would get up again, shake off the dust and continue the fight.

I am walking the path of truth. I am a blissful soul and it is my duty to fight my and others’ illrtendencies and stop not till the victory is won.

I am true to my oath, my intent, my sadhana and my ultimate goal.

I shall continue to search for, identify and weed out all my faults, with the same fervor I started out with.

The above mantra must be continuously contemplated upon along with assessment of success attained.

The above three great mantras: the fundamental tenets of Grahastha Yoga, the oath of firmness, and the oath to fight the holy war against faults and shortcomings r must always resound at the core of a sadhak’s mind keep him inspiring.

The ultimate objective of life is to make the individual soul unite with the Supreme Soul. To act for the good of all while forsaking individual selfish desires is the real spiritual endeavor (sadhana). There could be several different ways to pursue this sadhana in practical lives. Grahastha Yoga is one such way. Sincere adoption of above guidelines of this yoga in practice will not only edify one’s personal and family life but also contribute towards development of a better society. 
Reference:

[1] Grahastha Eka Yoga: (Book in Hindi by Pandit Shriram Sharma Acharya). Publishers: Yug  Nirman Yojna, Mathura (7th Print), 2004.